For Eli…

For Eli…

What makes a man…  What speaks loudest about who a man, and sets his life apart from others?  It’s the way that he lives that life and the lives of others that he touches along the way.  In short, his LEGACY.

            Eli was a light in this world that can often seem dim.  “A breath of fresh air” as some have called him, called “best friend” by probably every friend he ever had, a brother, and a son.  He was a loving, genuine, caring young man that impacted all of our lives and countless others in many ways.  There is not time enough in the world for me to tell you how much he meant to me, or how much my girls loved him.  To try and fit it in here would do an injustice.  I have, however, heard so many stories about him lately that show his caring nature; some that show his “uniqueness”; and others that show his love of life, family and people.  But here’s the beautiful thing: although we all knew different facets of Eli, we all knew the SAME Eli, and you love him just as I do. 

            I met Eli and John when they were about 16.  My wife and I would pick them up for worship practice on Thursday nights.  These were some interesting drives.  This was when they exposed me to “Christian metal”.  The music would come on and both of them would close their eyes, play air guitar, drum the seats.. all the while, the singer would be screaming incomprehensible words and when I looked at them more than a little confused, they would say  with a big smile “isn’t it beautiful?” and tell me all about the lyrics.  I’m still a fan, and now I get the confused looks.  It has been a pleasure to watch them both grow, and to have developed a close personal relationship since then.  My daughter Lily would always ask John “where’s Eli?” and would ask Eli “where’s John?”.  She was always so concerned for them.  Once, Nichole asked Lily “who is your favorite, me or John?”  Her reply was an emphatic “ELI!”  You know she loves you all though!

            I also had the extreme pleasure to have worked alongside Eli in a few of the ministries in our church, Journey groups and the worship team.  I have heard it said that in ministry, the people that you work with will do more for you than you will for them.  In this case, I can tell you that is the truth.  Eli had a knack for bringing the best out of people, and he was a great encouragement to me personally.  He had a way of keeping me focused.  Sometimes we would be playing in a worship service and when I turned to give him a cue, I would see him behind the drums with his eyes closed, both drumsticks in one hand, and both hands raised in worship… He always kept the main thing the main thing.  A true worshipper.

            Ecclesiastes 12:1 says this: “1 Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, 
before the days of trouble come and the years approach when you will say, “I find no pleasure in them”—

Eli did just that.  Not only was he unashamed in his worship, but he was not afraid to talk about Jesus, he was not afraid to carry his bible, he was not afraid to pray for people in need, he was not afraid to tell people the words to some of his crazy music…and he was not afraid of what the future held for him.  He knew where he would be going.  He knew his heavenly Father’s voice, and that is what he heard calling him home.  This is not a cause for sadness, but for rejoicing!  We can rest assured that he heard those sweet words “well done, my good and faithful servant” because that is exactly what he was, and what he lived for. 

            Be encouraged!  Although we all mourn the loss of him here, Heaven is a richer place because of him, and we all know that he is dancing on streets of gold with his earbuds in, laughing with his fist in front of his mouth, and most importantly, he is in the presence of God.  Honor Eli’s memory by doing what he did best, and touch someone’s life.. pray for someone… worship God.  Psalms 62:8 says: Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.

            In closing, I would like to say this.  Eli and I always had disagreements on what constituted a “dress shoe” and was appropriate for a Sunday morning service.  I’d show up in my shiny dress shoes and slacks, only to find him there in black “skinny jeans” and what I always called “those TOMS shoes”.  Ever the humanitarian, he would explain that for every pair you bought, they sent a pair to a child in need.. and that was all he had.  Well guess what Eli… You win. 

I’ll be seeing you little brother, and when I do… we’ll rock the house of houses.

Corey.

better late than never

Been a while since I updated this random collection of thoughts.  The winds of change are blowing full force around here these days.  Lost my job due to "downsizing to conform to the corporate model" and found out we are expecting another baby the day before that!  Normally, people would completely lose it at this point wondering what they are going to do now... I'm sure that I'm not the first to encounter this sort of painted into a corner situation.  Here's the funny thing though; I'm not worried at all.

neither hot nor cold......yet.

...but lukewarm.  BLECCCCHHHH... I know it's not a word, but the sound implied says it all.  How can people willfully choose to associate themselves with individuals that are DRIVEN... and continue to stay only lukewarm and idle.  They call themselves "a part of something" but they are noncontributory in their presence.  It seems to me that would get really old really fast.  This type of person just doesn't fit the old stereotype "birds of a feather".  They choose to stay around the motivated, driven, passionate people and not become one.  "...Why?... If you are not going to change your ways and get excited about....anything, really, then WHY do you stay?"  Ever thought that about anyone?
    Here is my theory.  No one, I repeat, NO ONE enjoys being lukewarm, idle or stagnant.  We all have potential for greatness.  Those people that you have been thinking of while you read the preceding paragraph? You better show those people some love, because when their switch gets turned on they are going to outperform you like you would not believe.  While you have been so concerned with their general lack of care and contribution, they have been watching and taking note of all the things NOT to do.  They will succeed where you have failed.  They will surpass you in the areas that you only thought that you excelled in.  They will be in high gear, and you will be left right where you are, wondering what got a hold of them.  I only came to this conclusion earlier this evening.  I found myself wondering how and why people can choose to sit in neutral while surrounded by people constantly on the move.  The kicker was that while stuck in contemplative frustration... I myself was in neutral.  Why would these people finally choose to move if I continue to analyze the "whys" of their persistent neutrality and show them no encouragement to get on with it?  Ever "stopped and thought"? Careful with that one.  Some things you are just not meant to figure out, so don't get stagnant while trying to figure these people out.
   Each one of us has a destiny.  Each one of us has a divine purpose to fulfill in our allotted time here on earth.  Just as you can not make Big Ben chime before the set time, you can not make a person "switch on" until it is their time.  Everything happens when it is supposed to happen because it is all by design.  That person that you have had in your mind this whole time (yes, don't deny it, you were thinking about someone that this applies to) WILL get in gear eventually.  Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is not to force things, but to encourage  their growth, build them up, and equip them for the time that is coming.  Accept this mission and their success will be your success.  Seeing them move forward and become a driven, motivated, passionate contributor to something of great merit will do far more good for you than sitting here wondering why they can't get it together right now.  Find that person, give them a good shot of encouragement, and continue moving forward blazing a trail... odds are, when you get tired they may just be the person that will end up right next to you helping you continue on.

obligation=motivation

Sometimes the only thing that keeps you going is obligation.  It is during those times that your dedication is put to the test.  There is a difference between the two, but their relationship is obvious.. you persevere.  Obligation keeps you going when you don't want to but you know that you will let someone down if you quit.  There will be a gaping hole in the place YOU should have been, and it will affect everyone and everything around you.  The thing about an obligation is this; it is a promise, a word, a guarantee that you will be where you say you will be when you say you will be there doing what you said you would do.  It's like a contract of sorts with someone else, working towards a goal that may not even be your own.
Dedication is much the same, in that you show up and follow through... but now you're doing it because you want to.  You're doing it because you have a vision or a goal that you are determined to reach, no matter the cost.  Dedication means that it is personal.  The only contract, guarantee, promise that you have made is to yourself.  No one likes to let themselves down, so you are much more motivated to continue.  When your vision gets clouded, or someone comes along to rain on your parade it gets difficult.  Sometimes it can become so hard to continue pressing on that your dedication becomes obligation.  Vision-killers, nay-sayers, people trying to buck the system... no matter how dedicated you are these people will have some sort of impact on what you are trying to accomplish.  A true leader and visionary will persevere through these times, maybe a little beat up or worse for wear.  With the vision clouded, obligation steps in and it can become just a task.  THIS IS A TEST.  I REPEAT, THIS IS ONLY A TEST... Dedication is refreshed in these times of operating under obligation.  The obligation gets you through the rough time, and when the storm passes you find that your dedication is twice as strong, and the vision remains.  That being said, my unbalanced equation in the title makes sense now.  Knowing that you made it through the tough times when it was "just a job", you stuck it out and had the tenacity to persevere when everything was against your success should MOTIVATE you.  That's the mark of a leader..when you stay determined, stay motivated, even when it feels like an obligation.

This made more sense in my head I think.. but you get the picture.

useless posting

Not much good to say today.  I could whine about how hard school is.  I could whine about how all I do is work.  I could whine about being late on my homework.  I could whine about not having anything good to say.  I could whine about having to listen to you whine about every sentence started so far begins with "I". I could.. but I won't.  

I just finished this:

I thought it was fitting for a project done entirely on the due date.  No matter what I do I can not seem to devote the kind of time to school that needs to be.  Family, work, church, school, etc...  Summer is around the corner though.  Even though I feel like a chump for only being able to take two classes at a time each semester, I am operating at my capacity right now.  For all the work being done, you'd think there would be more work being done though!  

pieces to a puzzle...

Ever read Revelation?  Ever think about how it will all go down?  Watching one crisis after another unfold in every part of the world, I couldn't help but think about the future.  Jesus said this about the future: (quoted from NIV) Matthew chapter 24:1-51
¹ Jesus left the temple and was walking away when his disciples came up to him to call his attention to its buildings. ² “Do you see all these things?” he asked. “Truly I tell you, not one stone here will be left on another; every one will be thrown down.”
 ³ As Jesus was sitting on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to him privately. “Tell us,” they said, “when will this happen, and what will be the sign of your coming and of the end of the age?”
 ⁴ Jesus answered: “Watch out that no one deceives you. ⁵ For many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Messiah,’ and will deceive many. ⁶ You will hear of wars and rumors of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. ⁷ Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places. ⁸ All these are the beginning of birth pains.
   ⁹ “Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me. ¹⁰ At that time many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, ¹¹ and many false prophets will appear and deceive many people. ¹² Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, ¹³ but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. ¹⁴ And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.
   ¹⁵ “So when you see standing in the holy place ‘the abomination that causes desolation,’^[a] spoken of through the prophet Daniel—let the reader understand— ¹⁶ then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains. ¹⁷ Let no one on the housetop go down to take anything out of the house. ¹⁸ Let no one in the field go back to get their cloak. ¹⁹ How dreadful it will be in those days for pregnant women and nursing mothers! ²⁰ Pray that your flight will not take place in winter or on the Sabbath. ²¹ For then there will be great distress, unequaled from the beginning of the world until now—and never to be equaled again.
   ²² “If those days had not been cut short, no one would survive, but for the sake of the elect those days will be shortened. ²³ At that time if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Messiah!’ or, ‘There he is!’ do not believe it. ²⁴ For false messiahs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect. ²⁵ See, I have told you ahead of time.
   ²⁶ “So if anyone tells you, ‘There he is, out in the wilderness,’ do not go out; or, ‘Here he is, in the inner rooms,’ do not believe it. ²⁷ For as lightning that comes from the east is visible even in the west, so will be the coming of the Son of Man. ²⁸ Wherever there is a carcass, there the vultures will gather.
   ²⁹ “Immediately after the distress of those days
   “‘the sun will be darkened,
   and the moon will not give its light;
the stars will fall from the sky,
   and the heavenly bodies will be shaken.’^[b]
   30 “Then will appear the sign of the Son of Man in heaven. And then all the peoples of the earth^[c] will mourn when they see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven, with power and great glory.^{[d] 31} And he will send his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of the heavens to the other.
   ³² “Now learn this lesson from the fig tree: As soon as its twigs get tender and its leaves come out, you know that summer is near. ³³ Even so, when you see all these things, you know that it^[e] is near, right at the door. ³⁴ Truly I tell you, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. ³⁵ Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.

The Day and Hour Unknown

    ³⁶ “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son,^[f] but only the Father. ³⁷ As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. ³⁸ For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark; ³⁹ and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away. That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. ⁴⁰ Two men will be in the field; one will be taken and the other left. ⁴¹ Two women will be grinding with a hand mill; one will be taken and the other left.
   ⁴² “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come. ⁴³ But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into. ⁴⁴ So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.
   ⁴⁵ “Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom the master has put in charge of the servants in his household to give them their food at the proper time? ⁴⁶ It will be good for that servant whose master finds him doing so when he returns. ⁴⁷ Truly I tell you, he will put him in charge of all his possessions. ⁴⁸ But suppose that servant is wicked and says to himself, ‘My master is staying away a long time,’ ⁴⁹ and he then begins to beat his fellow servants and to eat and drink with drunkards. ⁵⁰ The master of that servant will come on a day when he does not expect him and at an hour he is not aware of. ⁵¹ He will cut him to pieces and assign him a place with the hypocrites, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

So again, I ask... have you ever thought about any of this?  Just like the fig tree's budding branches, these things seem to be unfolding right before our eyes.  I'm not trying to provoke fear or unrest, both are unwarranted because as Jesus said (above) all of this MUST happen before the end.  The only real question is are you ready if it were to happen right now?  I have been in the circles that most would call "conspiracy theorists" for many years now, and do believe that there are hidden powers at work behind the scenes, but I balance everything that I read against the bible.  I know that a rebellion is pointless even it was successful... in some form or another, it would only coincide with the plans already in place and the events already foretold.  There are good things that come from the same sources though.  Things like what is put in our tapwater, what goes into all the vaccines and their (super fine print) potential side-effects.  I believe that being educated is a good thing, but there is an overwhelming amount of fearmongering out there as well.  Balance is key. 
   I had a dream years ago that I can remember quite vividly to this very day.  The emotional impact of it was so terrifyingly real that it is tatooed on my soul forever.  In this dream, I was on a beach littered with broken concrete and reebar.  It looked like a warzone, with broken buildings and rubble strewn everywhere.  I was looking for someone or something, alone but not alone... there were people around, but none I knew.  All of a sudden, a great and terrible noise like nothing I had ever heard before broke the eerie silence.  It sounded like thunder, cymbals crashing, trumpets blasting, bass that took my breath away, and mountains moving all at once.  Instinctively, I looked up to the sky.  The clouds had parted and I saw something I don't quite know how to describe.. it was like a chariot being pulled by griffin-like creatures with wings on fire (not scriptural I'm sure, but I have quite the imagination I guess).  I knew exactly who it was and fell on the ground...crying uncontrollably, knowing, just KNOWING that I had waited too long to change and that I had failed in the one thing I was put on this earth for.  That feeling was so overwhelming... I should have been happy.  I should have been rejoicing.  But I wasn't.  I remember thinking that this was the VERY END, and that I had missed the boat.  I woke up from that dream in a cold sweat and with tears in my eyes.  At the time, I was very far from God.  A dream like that will surely make you reconsider your choices, actions, words.. a dream like that would even make a non-believer question wether they haven't just been wrong all along.  I really believe that God was showing me something in my dream, wether figurative or literal... I had to change, and I have to keep changing and growing.  I do not want to miss the boat. 
   I want to grow old.  I want to see my children grow up and be successful and happy.  I want to be a grandpa like the ones I have been blessed to have.  I plan on that happening, but in the back of my mind I am and will strive to always be ready if Jesus decides to come back in my lifetime.  There have always been those on streetcorners shouting about doomsday, it seems that they are a part of every generation.  I believe they are there to keep us thinking, to keep us looking up, and to keep the thought fresh in our minds that it could happen any day.  It's not something that I am afraid of but rather, something I should be prepared for.    
   In this age where there is so much unrest and so little faith in big government, chaos and anarchy are on the rise.  Protect yourself and your family physically, but be sure and protect yourself and your family spiritually as well.  To those that believe different than I do:  I sincerely hope that you reconsider and do not have to feel what I felt in that dream.  I don't say that to "force my 'religion' on you" as the world is so fond of saying to Christians.. I only offer a simple truth in the dark and tumultuous days that we live in, and will continue to try and share that truth until my dying OR last breath on this earth.   

work work work work work

Sometimes it seems like all I do is work.  I know there is a payoff somewhere down the road, but it sure is a long road.  I think I'm going to initiate a change in my schedule.  All of the things that don't really matter are going to be cut out so that I have more time for the things that do.  Starting Monday, you'll be seeing a lot less of me on the "social networks", I'm going to get back into getting up early and doing P90x, and I'm going to study more.  Since Michelle's birthday I have been feeling a little old.  She's not even 30 yet!  I feel like I've already let so much time go by, and a lot of that time was spent foolishly.  The founder of IKEA lives by the 10 minute rule.  He lives each day in ten minute increments, trying to invest as much as he can in each interval.  This means trimming the fat from the day.  The fat is the activities and actions that do not contribute to your healthy life such as TV, FACEBOOK, internet, etc.  I'm going to start trying to invest more in the time that God has given me.  You just don't know how much you have!  As a man, it is my lot in life to work.  There's no way around that, but the extra time I have is going to be spent a little more wisely from here on out.  If you catch me wasting time point me in the direction of this post for a refresher.  Time..... why would anyone really want to waste it?  In the end, all we have is time.  God gave us a specific number of days to spend on this earth, so live each minute of every one of them  for what they are; a precious gift not to be squandered or taken lightly.  Lord, have mercy on me for wasting so much time.
   That being said, I would not take back ANY of the things from my past.  It's those things, those moments, those decisions that helped to shape the person I am today.  It was a rough road filled with many trials, heartbreaks, setbacks and consequences, but each and every one left a lasting impact on my character.  God used those ugly things for good, taught me lessons and built me up like a phoenix repeatedly rising from the ashes to be something new.  I have a wonderful life, a beautiful wife, two amazing daughters and the best family and friends a person could ever wish for.  Proof that God really does make all things work together for the good of those who love Him.
                                    Now to get better......at everything.... and time to GET TO WORK.